Moxie for Life

Yesterday I felt really weird. I called Tony and asked him how changing up the eating schedule on my day off affects me. He said it can, but to make sure I’m eating at 2 hours so it won’t be a big deal. Duh…I thought it was three hours. Ok so I’m STARVING at 3 hours. So, he said to make up some healthy chicken soup and have it as a little snack in case I have that hunger thing again. My metabolism must be roaring about now. I ate at 2-2.5 hours today and have still felt hungry. Boy was I glad to see that chicken soup when I got home! Never been so happy about chicken soup…although a few noodles in it would be nice.;)

Ok, I was wondering how everyone takes their “stuff”…ie ACV, lemon juice, green tea extract, etc. I’m looking for variations.

Here’s me: AVC - I shoot it staight up. Lemon Juice - in my water. Green Tea Extract - In my coffee,then with the lemon juice water with a splenda. Glutamine - in my Myoplex shake. Flax oil - in my oatmeal, sometimes I make salad dressing with it.
How about you?

First of all, my thoughts on the weekend. I’m having a really hard time enjoying my weekends for the past month. I know a lot of it is getting over the fact that most of the gatherings we have are wrapped around food. Lots of it and all kinds of fatty stuff. So, I’m either standing there staring at cheese stuffed potatoes (I don’t even really like potatoes that much) or cake baked with chocolate chip cookie dough inside it and wondering how the hell I’m gonna get out of there without eating it. I hear Tony echoing…”What do you really want?” Then there are the “are you dieting” or “you’re wasting away” comments. I can see why when it gets down to the wire of competing, you just stay home. I am still working out my feelings about food and trying to mesh them. The spirit is willing, the flesh is weak.

Secondly, rest day. I don’t want to rest. I have an isatiable urge to do more. I know my body needs the break, but I’m so dedicated (obsessed). That is a main reason I need to just rest. It’s not like I don’t have million other things I need to be doing. Yeah, those darn Algebra tests that need to be graded are looming. Maybe just a little walk on the tready. After all it’s raining and we can’t go do something active outdoors. Does anyone else fight themselves to actually NOT workout at all?

We went to Olive Garden last night and I was sadly disappointed. They had only one choice for me and even then, I got the grilled chicken it had some form of breading on it. I scraped what I could but probably got some unwanted calories, etc in there and it wasn’t nearly enough food. I was still hungry. Oh well, we don’t really like it that much anyway.

I told the kids if they were really good while dad was gone they could pick any place to go out to eat when he got back. They chose Olive Garden. So I went online to see what I can eat from there. Pretty much every meal is covered in some sort of sauce and served with pasta. I had salmon last night and wasn’t really wanting it again, but figured it was my only choice. Then I saw “grilled chicken” kids meal. What? Why the heck is there no grilled chicken on the adult side? So now I’m gonna try to get a kids meal. The last time I asked for a kids meal they acted like I was commiting a federal offense.

If you have that feeling of nausea and dizzyness and think why the f. am I putting myself through this, yep, you’re working your calves. My calves better look kick ass after what I did to them today. All I have to say is those other girls better be working their butts off.
To touch on my last post, I am really asking myself why am I doing this. I went to a party this weekend and said no to cake. People’s eyes bugged out. I talked to Tony. He said, if you want the cake, have the cake, but you have to know that some may never get what you are doing. But, he reminded me to be sure I know and I get it. My assignment is to write out 10 reasons why I’m doing this. The first 5 were pretty easy. Now I have to dig deep. I think another issue is that my hubby was out of town and he’s my biggest support. I missed him asking me how the gym was and encouraging me to eat broccoli and telling me the spaghetti tastes gross, just to make me feel good. I’m better now.

After all, I’m rockin my shredded calves.

Am I doing this right? I gotta call Tony. I feel lost.

I’m almost what I weighed in high school that is so weird to me. When you start having kids everyone says you’ll never go back to where you were before. I guess I’ve proved them wrong, huh? And I think it’s a better me at that weight.

I just printed out my leg workout for tomorrow and… holy crap! I’m scared. At least I’m working out after work tomorrow instead of in the AM since hubby will be gone. So, I won’t have to walk up and down stairs at school all day afterwards. we’ll see how it goes. Also weigh in day tomorrow. I’m excited, well more like pensive. If I don’t have awesome results tomorrow, well, Tony and I will be having a pow wow. I took some pics and it definitely looks like changes. But I know I don’t have much weight to lose, so we’ll see.

Despite a uncomfortable living situation that caused me much grief today, I press on. My goal for the next four days is not step on the scale. Not even once until Tuesday morning for weigh in. Ask me if I can do it. Go ahead.